by Dillon Farnum
Nov. 8, 2007
I feel like hearing the two letters "O" and "J" in succession couldn't have come any sooner. Seeing this man on television, as the Fresh Prince would put it, "sparks up nostalgia." I am reminded of better times: Watching Oksana Baiul's frail little body hold up that heavy gold medal whilst Nancy and Tonya duked it out backstage. Receiving "Vital Information" from esteemed All That cast member Lori Beth Denberg.
We always bitch and moan about whether or not O.J. was guilty back in 1994. I feel if Orenthal is proclaimed guilty for this crime, it will be a disservice to all of those that worked hard to keep him out of jail.
Luckily for us, as of March 2, 2006, NBC president Jeff Zucker opted to air all court cases live on prime time television. This gives America something to digest while the Jews, I mean television writers, are on strike.
I'm no better than anyone else though. Yes, even I, in a moment of weakness, joined the Kato Kaelin Fan Club. What's not to like about the guy? He is living proof that Ginger and Gilligan had sex.
I don't know if anyone else feels this way, but I'm thinking the American Public will be the eventual losers in this case. Assuming that O.J. is found guilty of this recent crime, it will feel like another Al Capone story, where he gets away with murder but is ultimately found guilty for something trivial like tax evasion.
He was trying to get back memorabilia of himself? Please. Upon listening to the hotel room tapes, I'm left wanting more. It just wasn't enough O.J. to satisfy this moment in my life. This coming from a gossip columnist might sound quaint to the lay person, but I got bills and shit.