by Eugene Delacroix
May 14, 2007
Sweet Lord! Look at that windbreaker! Somebody is selling this on E-Bay? And for only 15 dollars? Ha! Some people know the price of everything but the value of nothing! Well, then it is up to me to capitalize on the error of this Momence, Illinois, seller who throws away gold like so much rock salt.
I don't think I'm exaggerating when I saw that this Surf Style jacket will finally complete me.
That rainbow glow takes me back to when I had life by the horns. I was wearing one at the Toad the Wet Sprocket concert the night that Tiffany and I did it in the hatchback of my Dodge Daytona for the first time. I also had it when we went to afterprom at Six Flags. I used it to smuggle beer when I went in through the broken back door of a gyro stand while our buddy, Boz, distracted some foreign chick with some line about marriage and green cards. Man, it held so many freaking tall boys.
We were making out in the roller coaster line, then it started raining. So we sat at this picnic table under a tree and drank what we could while we used the trusty Surf Style like an umbrella. Then we took things back to the Daytona, and about 9 months later, Bailey hit the scene. I think I remember pawning the jacket along with some Reebok Pumps for the sonogram money.
It's alright. Bailey's a cool kid. I think I'd pawn about 10 Surf Styles for her if I really had to.
Man, time flies when you have a family and a landscaping business to run on the weekend. I haven't even had time to think about a Surf Style. But I knew something was missing. I just couldn't put my finger on it until I saw the self-described "interplanetary body gear" in all its glory.
I wish that it had one of those "Buy It Now" options. I mean, there's probably tons of dudes out there like myself just drooling over it like I am. Who wouldn't? The pockets are huge. When you wear one to the county fair, you don't even have to take a fanny pack for your tickets.
It's cool, though. I have a hunch I'm gonna come out with a Surf Style here. Tiffany will be so surprised she'll probably jump my bones like the old days. I'm gonna wear it every chance I get. Hell, everything comes back in style at some point. Except that Members Only jacket.