by Johnny Guatemala
May 21, 2009
CULVER CITY, CA--A grave miscalculation about the humor regarding his clumsy participation in the Kalamazoo Rotary Club's attempt to build a catamaran for a Lake Michigan regatta fundraiser made America painfully aware of the awkwardness of Jeopardy contestant Stanley Chu on Thursday night's episode.
Receiving no response from host Alex Trebek, America became relieved as he proceeded to fellow contestant, Hilda Sanchez, for her introductory statement. The Tempe, Arizona, paralegal proceeded to bore viewers with her dull recounting of her husband's marriage proposal at the Grand Canyon, but was given slack for not being Chu.
Unfortunately, Chu's social gaffe was not his first on the show, as he was the returning champion from the previous episode. Viewers cringed as he went through the excruciating minutia of how he accidentally told his Mandarin Chinese professor "I request that you die" instead of "hello."
Jeopardy aficionados agreed that Chu's stories have been the worst of the season so far, but have not yet reached the Stumph Line, a barometer for game show contestant awkwardness. The term refers to 1989 contestant Glen Stumph, whose terrible Bill Cosby impersonation and talking cadence which sounded like someone forcing out their sentences before hiccupping were lowlights for the program. His appearance led to the controversial five-episode limit for winners, which was only repealed in 2004.
Show producers said they are not about to reinstate the limit, provided that Chu lose within several episodes. However, they hope Chu can be derailed from sharing his pointless stories with a snarky response from Trebek, preferrably about how Chu should use his winnings to "get some."
Thankfully, Ken Jennings ran out of anectdotes during his 75-show run.